I am led to a pool by a blue butterfly.
The path there runs uphill through struggle and sorrow.
At the pool I seek answers within its deep sky;
I am given a sword which I'll only borrow.
The path next continues through struggle and sorrow.
With a blue butterfly to lead me and guide me,
I carry the sword gift which I'll only borrow;
in its blade lies the truth shining bright here beside me.
With a blue butterfly to lead me, it guides me
to the halls of Tuatha de Danann, magically lit
by the truth of this blade unsheathed here beside me.
In the glade of the moon Dúnedain again sit.
From the halls of Tuatha de Danann, magically lit,
to the woods of warlords dried dark with spilled blood.
By the glade of the moon, Dúnedain again sit
while invoking the spell to cleanse sin with a flood.
In washed woods of warlords dried dark with spilled blood,
rain would flow to blue pools that reflect the deep sky,
peace invoked by a spell that cleansed sin with a flood;
I return with the sword and the blue butterfly.
© Gay Reiser Cannon * 2011* All Rights Reserved
Blue Butterfly by beachanny
Posted for Pantoum at dVersePoets FormForAll on Thursday 9/7/2011
Join us there for a discussion and challenge of a Pantoum
I enjoyed hearing you read, Gay. Your choice of subject matter lends itself well to the form. I like the bits of alliteration, how you handle the imagery of light and blueness, and the seemingly natural way you sustain the imagery and then bring it all together in the last stanza. (I last tried the pantoum form in Nov. 2010 for sharing at One Stop; it was my "Holding Hands" piece. Maybe I'll try it again.)
ReplyDeleteThank you Maureen! This was much more difficult than a villanelle for me. I tried to have it write itself, and it said, "no, no, no" so I carved it out word by word. I don't like having to write that way, but it conforms I think. Thanks for appreciating it. I remember yours. If you don't get a new one written, link it for today, please.
ReplyDeleteLovely to hear your voice Ms Cannon! I don't know if I did something wrong or I tried to adhere to the rules too strictly but yours had the feeling of freeverse without the stifling rules of the refrains. Lovely blue butterfly and Irish myth combined here though. thanks for the lesson Gay x
ReplyDeleteOh, I love the idea of this... I hope to join the pantoum fun, too. Thanks for showing us how :)
ReplyDeleteGay, this is simply stunning! You had me sold with the beautiful image, and your reading brought it to life! You know me...these forms cause me headaches no special Maritime air can cure...but each and every week, I am awed at the results. On an aside, when I clicked the link at dVerse...it told be this post did not exist, so I went to your blog directly and low and behold, I am once again left to cower my head in shame...this again, is stunning!
ReplyDeleteThanks you guys, enjoying reading yours so much. Natasha, thanks for the heads up. I deleted the first link. It gets to this page now. ;-)
ReplyDeleteGay - this has a lot of impact. I wish I could have heard you read it - my computer is playing silly buggars. Weaving the mythology throughout was such a magical journey for me. :)
ReplyDelete@Jo - try it again later. I think this stops if two try to access at once. Although it isn't important. Thanks so much for your kind words. I enjoyed yours so much. G.
ReplyDeleteGorgeous execution of the form - it flows effortlessly. Thank you for you explication of the form - I wrote one back in April but I used Baudelaire's four stanza form - I like the idea of the fifth stanza - you've inspired me to write more - I love triolets too
ReplyDeleteThis form really reads so well, I loved that you included a spoken version. Truly lovely write, I can see absolute beauty in this form. ~ Rose
ReplyDeleteGay, a really nice read. Love the tone you took and everything came together so smoothly and wonderfully. Really love the form and thanks so much for hosting it on D'verse, I hope a record number of links are set tonight:)
ReplyDeleteHey Gay - thank you for introducing me to this new form - i enjoy learning fast and with an amount of pressure - i can internalise this way and absorb then never forget - under different conditions i struggle to learn - so this is always my favourite dverse night.
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed hearing you read your work very much and oddly i have been listening to plath read all day and your voices felt similiar which i liked. of course poetry should be read aloud and by the author better still.
re my poem - the whole poem was about 3 colours - so i guess i hoped you may find sunburnt zebras within lol - thanks for your kind words - the jackdaw was a public house in a kent valley in the most pictureque location i have ever laid eyes on - something amazing happened their once but thats another poem.
thanks very much Gay - goodnight - a wonderful night for m e at the pub
Thank you Fred, C Rose, Marousia - for your kind words. If it's smooth, I am happy for it was rougher than sandpaper to pull it together.
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed the magical feel of this one, and I can certainly see how changing just a few words made this into a story that flowed. Thank you so much for teaching us. I love learning new things even if it's a little uncomfortable sometimes. You are much appreciated!
ReplyDeleteok, i stayed strict to rules...but i love how you played through out with the little line changes...i am breaking hte rules next time...haha...really this is magical and love the story within...and to hear you read is divine...smiles.
ReplyDeleteThe "washed wooods of warlords" veils this pantoum in the beautiful mists of legends! Fascinating!
ReplyDeleteI like the individual replies we get on wordpress. It's weirder on blogger as I don't get back so quickly. I love that you guys are responding to the myth. I started with the idea of a sword of truth thinking that would take me to Arthur or something similar.
ReplyDeleteShocked, really, it took me to Ireland. There are Biblical references that go far back, but the Gaelic myths regarding the swords may pre-date the Biblical ones and interestingly in some ways parallel them. I wonder how much mythology played into early bible translations done by Irish monks.
No one so far has called me out for the use of the Dúnedain which are (really) fictional from J.R.R. Tolkein's LORD OF THE RINGS. I liked the sound (as I pronounced it - who knows how he meant it to be pronounced ... oh yeah, I could have checked the movie, they would have researched that.) Well as I was going for a council of elders, shamans perhaps, I looked up Gaelic chieftain, king, and elder words and the "sounds" of those words didn't work; so, I used this. Ha.
Gorgeous!
ReplyDeleteTo those of you who got your pantoum to perform perfectly KUDOS. Many of you did. To those of you who changed it a little, I understand. It was the only way it would work for me once I'd chosen my subject. To those of you left rhyme behind, there are precedents my darling and your use of the repeating lines are probably rhyme enough. I think this is a magical form because within it, there is room for much innovation and versatility while keeping a structure to guide by.
ReplyDeleteA different write for you... looks like it took some time.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful piece... love the transitioning focus.
ReplyDeleteThis is really nice and you read it so well.. it feels so serene hearing you read such a wonderful piece.
ReplyDeleteI attempted reading this last night, but with a head too wrapped in cotton to get the rhythm (a hard job when your heartbeat is echoing in a fevered brain) I decided to leave it for today (in the hope of doing a better job). I am happy I did! I love the imagery and I'm just getting more and more taken with this form! *deep bow of awe*
ReplyDeleteBeautiful. I especially like the first and fourth stanzas.
ReplyDelete~laurie
what a tale of adventure and fantasy! and I love a happy ending. thanks for leading the pantoum-way over at the pub. good times!
ReplyDeleteI don't want to trivialize the message by calling this fun to read, but it really was, and I like that you picked the magpie bits out of myth and Tolkein to shore it up--I often do that--myth is such an essence in us, that you can use a little of it in the pulse points like a fragrance, I think, and get a lot of associative response. This was both entertaining, and engaging on a deeper level. Loved it.
ReplyDeleteLovely image, and a fascinating and beautiful poem. Thank you for your feedback on mine as well. Somehow I totally neglected to follow the pantoum rhyme scheme when I wrote it! May try to rewrite, may not.
ReplyDeleteHi Gay! What a fabulous ending as you return with "the sword and the butterfly".
ReplyDelete..From the halls of Tuatha de Danann, magically lit
ReplyDeleteto the woods of warlords dried dark with spilled blood..these lines took my breath away gay...but missed your piano in the reading..smiles
ah, Claudia, I'm at the beach and I took my little keyboard back to Arlington too. I'd have to use my alto recorder though...I suppose I could ??!
ReplyDeleteLovely pantoum! I just saw you'd done this for FormForAll and linked one up I'd already written. Nice piece my friend
ReplyDeleteAh adorable Luke..my love, so good to see you here!
ReplyDeleteThis sings to me!
ReplyDeleteSo interesting to see the form used in the context of fantasy and legend. The interweave works really well for this, like a spell or incantation as well as story.
ReplyDeleteexceptional pantoum. you seamlessly weaved a magical spell with your words. and i thoroughly enjoyed listening to you read.
ReplyDeleteMagical Gay. I was completely gripped and whisked away. The personal reading was excellent. Great job! :-)
ReplyDeleteWow, I read this and then I listened to you read it and have to say it was fabulous to hear it as you wanted it heard, with the emphasis on the exact words you wished it just bought it to life.
ReplyDeleteFabulous write and, read!
Irish myths are filled with so much blood, but aren't they all! I enjoyed hearing your read and reading along thank you! Well done.
ReplyDeleteWonderful rendition of a semmingly difficult form. I haven't had time to follow all of the d'verse offerings but would like to try this in the future. I loved your reading of the poem as well.
ReplyDeleteA magical write.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful. I enjoyed this mystical trip. I can picture the calm blue glow of butterfly and sword. Through the image of rain that cleanses, it brings about feelings of serenity.
ReplyDeleteEnjoyed hearing you read this as well.
All warlords should follow blue butterflies for a day. Then there would be no more war.
ReplyDeleteAn awesome poem!
of course the poem is only enhanced by your reading, but i didn't listen to that until having read through the poem first and it is wonderful and magical and your final stanza is so brilliant that i wonder ~ did you start with it and then fulfill the requirements of the form in the other stanzas? how else could you have arrived at such perfection for the form?
ReplyDeleteyou are truly a gifted poet, Gay, and i enjoy your form posts very much even when i don't participate. i've read many of the pantoum submissions and they are so wonderful that it proves you are also a gifted teacher. thank you for continuing to share your knowledge. ♥ dani
Dear Dani. I can't remember if I started with the end, although I have to admit I usually do. My beginnings are terrible. I once begged Pete Marshall to share his secret of great first lines, and embarrassed him. He said they came naturally as breezes in springtime to him. He'd made a poem once of all the first lines that occurred to him.
ReplyDeleteSomewhere I think I wrote that the idea of a blue butterfly was born out of the idea of the blue unicorn. I like the symbolic idea of freedom and wanted to trace that idea to its core, to English common law and thinking Arthurian legend. So I started investigating the sword of truth which led me to the story, and then the form became the overlay and this is where it finished. Thank you for the kind words. Poetry is eluding me lately. Although I have one ready for this week's form, the one I've been rolling around in my head for two weeks is not taking shape. I should have written it down when I first had the idea - at least I'd have something to hang it on.