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Tuesday, February 4, 2014

An Adventure in SongWriting

I am posting my first youtube video today - with the lyrics I wrote to Somewhere In Time. It was "our song" for my husband and me.  The original lyrics never meant much to me so I chose it to see if I could re-write the lyrics for my article on Songwriting at d'VersePoets Pub 2/6/2014. You can watch it here or on youtube.
This attempt was trying to write to a previously written song.


Apparently the video isn't always available.  I apologize for not having done so earlier but will
post here the copy of my lyrics.

WILL YOU BE THERE

You were my star
You shaped my cosmos
You helped me understand
how love lets lives collide.

You were my strength
And yet my weakness;
I never could deny
your slightest request.

You were my joy
My constant comfort
You were the rhythms beating strong
beneath my song.

You were the friend
I could rely on
Magnetic north that
pulled my face to yours.

Where are you now?
Will you be waiting?
Will you be there for me
again when stars collide?

That is my hope
That in some new time,
We'll love again.

© Gay Reiser Cannon * 2014 * All Rights Reserved

My second attempt was to compose a song for a poem I had in my draft folder. It's a weak poem that I had abandoned but it had some song like qualities so I used it for a lament..in a minor key -- it's my first real composition..so you'll have to cut me some slack.  I had to record old school off my piano and make up some chords to go with as I played..again, I never actually studied composition. So.............that said.
Here's the poem and the recording of the music to go with.

The Lonely Child

The lonely child is a fantastic child
The lonely child is an artistic child
The lonely child invents a world all her own

To a lonely child
Celluloid lives may be like first cousins
She knows they're related and feels their attraction

To a lonely child
Externals have just two dimensions.
People there live in beautiful mansions;
they have parties with friends and have fun.

But to a lonely child
Her only excitement
lives in the landscapes of her mind.

The lonely child sings a song of joy
That sometimes hides a world of woe
The lonely child is not always sad
And yet the lonely child still feels all alone.

© Gay Cannon * 2/4/14 * All Rights Reserved




38 comments:

  1. Two beautiful efforts, Gay! I really like the words you came up with for "Somewhere in Time." And I think that the piano composition so well conveys the feeling of aloneness of the lonely child. I can really HEAR someone singing that song.

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  2. both of them are very beautiful gay... i could listen to you playing the piano for hours... and songwriting is an adventure indeed...i wrote some songs that we sang at church but it's been quite a while...looking forward to the prompt tomorrow and i sing along...smiles

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  3. One of the sadnesses in my life is that I am not musical, couldn't carry tune in a saucepan, and never could play an instrument; used to match pitches and talk-sing through songs as an Actor, but that was my best effort. "Song Lyrics" is a great prompt, Gay; I, too, could listen to you play the piano for hours. Some of the best poets, like Cohen & Joni Mitchell, are song writers. You really thwacked my inner metronome today, dear lady.

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  4. I couldn't read it while listening to the music but got the gist. Loved the piano--reminded me of the scene inThe Godfather when they're on the mattresses. Nice poem as well. I was hoping you would sing. >KB

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  5. Uhmmm once upon a time I might have - I once had an OK voice - but my range is small now and low and without the control I might have needed. Also this is about as technical as I get (smiles). Thanks for the comment though. Much appreciated.

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  6. Lovely music. I too wanted to here those words sung.

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  7. Love what you did in both songs here Gay.. the melody was so great... so good to have a melody to go with as well..

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  8. ah...very cool on the video gay...i enjoyed it much...and it makes me smile as being your song....loved the piano as well...takes me back home...the second makes me sad..i know too many lonely childs....

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  9. We don't need to cut you any slack at all, Gay! It was all just lovely. Thank you for sharing this with us and for hosting tonight.

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  10. Ah, I heard an echo of Rachmaninoff I think in the first one...it fit very well the movie of the same name with the violins and the second one was definitely a melody I could listen to over and again.

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  11. Hey y'all - I'm so jazzed up that you liked these efforts. I was pretty pleased with the you tube...those hubble photos always inspire me ...what ?? I must have four poems I wrote to them. The second I was less confident about. You have buoyed me! Thanks.

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  12. That was a nice praise to your husband. And the words suited the tune well. Your other effort I think is also nice, but it is not a tune, in that respect the tune should be possible to remember. But you have expressed the loneliness and confusion of that child well.

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    1. Yes that is my problem with it as well Anders; however, I think if I only knew how to arrange it and build some transitions and possibly try a few inversions in the middle it might be more "memorable". I feel as though there is some information just outside my sphere of knowledge that might "save" that little tune.

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  13. You have turned this into a real musical evening. I am so enjoying everybody's effort and I'm sure I want to try and write some music now, but that will take a few days, to get the chords on the guitar sorted. Thank you for your piano music and the inspiration for us all.

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  14. Hanna - thank you so much for your comment. I'm enjoying this too. We have many musicians among us and everyone loves some music. It's great to have a world-wide share! Looking forward to your piece any time.

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  15. I love the idea of re-writing a love song that is meaningful to both of you ~ I found myself singing along, so I thought the cadence is perfect~

    As to the second one, I like that the lonely child is singing a song of joy ~ Both writings are a joy to read tonight ~

    Grace

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  16. the lonliness seem to wail in the piano notes
    haunting pain
    but beautiful

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    1. I wish the quality of the recording were better - but it's the best I could do with my equipment. I want to work on the supporting chord structures and some transitions. It will get better I think. Thank you for reading and your comment.

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  17. I enjoyed the first poem, but the second one? Christ Gay, I am an only child and you just summed up my entire childhood with this. That the lonely child in this happens to be female makes it sear all the more with me. I simply sighed at the closing lines it struck so very close to home. Mother swore I had my second son so close after the first because I did not want him to an only child. I'm gutted in memory.

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  18. Oh Raivenne - I'm reaching out to you. I wish we could touch all those only, lonely souls. Thank you.

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  19. lovely - perhaps we are made for music.

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  20. I wasn't able to listen to the first one, but the second one is so lovely. So sad, it truly accomplishes the mood. The music is perfect for it.

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  21. Come back later if you like. Sometimes it goes funky on youtube apparently. It went out for about an hour about 4 pm today.

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  22. So enjoyed your piano composition, Gay...haunting...it fits your lyrics so well. I could relate to being that lonely child too even though surrounded within a large, chaotic household. Made a world for myself through reading...and celluloid. Touched me deeply.

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  23. Both of them are equally good. I liked lonely child more...it somewhere resonates with me.

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  24. Both lovely Gay, I have always wanted to play the piano, loved this verse
    But to a lonely child
    Her only excitement
    lives in the landscapes of her mind.

    Such sadness but penned beautifully.

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  25. I love your piano piece. :-) It complements your poem very nicely. :-)

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  26. Gay. Very impressive! Really enjoyed both your songs and the prompt. Thank you :-)

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  27. Gay you are so talented! Really enjoyed both. Thank you :-)

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  28. Great duo Gay! Any song accompanied on piano is bound to have a grand following. Nicely!

    Hank

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  29. Wow! I love the composition, Gay! I was disappointed you didn't sing along with it! The words and music together are a wonderful song! Very nice "first?" effort!

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  30. You did wonderfully. "magnetic north that pulled my face to yours" really sang to me.

    Thanks for stopping by and enjoying my humorous approach.

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  31. Beautiful, Beautiful, dear friend...that phrase: "Magnetic north that pulled my face to yours " got me good. Too early for tears, but that is what your compositions produced.

    Love, Jane

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  32. the youtube URL: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c7Xqdldeld8

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