crisp autumn leaves change
turn vivid in light's bright rays
brilliant year-end days
born to the season
the number five burnished gold
November unfolds
your life unravels
while time dances pirouettes
overlapping itself
ends meet beginnings
the future lies in mirrors
the past, jacket close
a flash behind eyes
memories like darting birds
time like leaves shredded
debris of spent years
caught in the cracks and corners
now treasured relics
measured clarity
when wisdom surmounts passion
yet flows to the sea
words spilled from our cups
linger through changing seasons
define you and me
turn vivid in light's bright rays
brilliant year-end days
born to the season
the number five burnished gold
November unfolds
your life unravels
while time dances pirouettes
overlapping itself
ends meet beginnings
the future lies in mirrors
the past, jacket close
a flash behind eyes
memories like darting birds
time like leaves shredded
debris of spent years
caught in the cracks and corners
now treasured relics
measured clarity
when wisdom surmounts passion
yet flows to the sea
words spilled from our cups
linger through changing seasons
define you and me
© Gay Reiser Cannon * All Rights Reserved
Oh wow what a piece. I love the rhythm of this piece and the pictures and images that it conjures
ReplyDelete"Your life unravels
while time dances pirouettes
overlapping itself"
This is such a glorious image like silk being unfolded.
The last stanza
"Words spilled from our cups
linger through changing seasons
define you and me"
Just says it all.
Thanks Gwei. It's a birthday poem for a friend I've known since high school.
ReplyDeleteI so much value your support. You nearly always come to read my work. This piece wrote itself rather naturally. I like it when they come as in one breath.
this was a marvellous poem and thanks for the extra bit of knowledge re 5...hope you link this to One Shot this week so it gets the views it deserves? cheers Pete
ReplyDeleteThanks Pete and for the "jacket" prompt :) I thought it fit just right.
ReplyDeleteA thoughtful use of words and images,
ReplyDelete"memories like darting birds
time like leaves shredded"
fits the November mood perfectly, reminscing the spilled cups of words, relationship changes, fall.
Thank you Terresa and glad to know you're original work is being spotlighted today on OneStopPoetry. You certainly deserve it. You are a gifted poet!
ReplyDeleteSo Norman Rockwell but with a hint of misty eye. There is the somber address to the end of the year and yet a few dance steps left.
ReplyDeleteLoved the line where "Ends meets beginnings" such a visual!!
A fantastic One Shot my friend
Moonie Hugs
Saw this earlier in the week when time was short, so enjoyed the chance to read it again--it's November somber but tied into both the shared warmth of December holidays and the renewal of spring to come. Lovely work, Gay.
ReplyDeleteYou've captured November in nature and the human here. Excellent.
ReplyDeletelovely piece...esp the dance of time and as it turns back on itself...fun read. nice one shot!
ReplyDeleteWhat a wonderful and haunting poem!
ReplyDeleteNovember has a significance to me, it's a 'sum up' month of anticipation and regrets..
I love the structure and imagery of this poem.
And your rhythm follows well through to the end.
A lovely and mature piece.
Lady Nyo
nice, incredible last verse!
ReplyDeleteSo lyrical and so lovely...
ReplyDeleteAnd your cat is gorgeous!
Beautiful rhythm and flow--a dance you say? Well it is apt to describe this piece. You've well-captured the season in your words and your images!
ReplyDeleteThanks Ms Moon, yes there is a somber quality to this piece deriving from another ending season and another added year. The realization that we seem still while time dances all around us not noticing that we are changing too.
ReplyDelete@hedgewitch I really appreciate your comments. I think you saw it going up as I wrote it...literally on twitter as each stanza is meant to be a free standing haiku and I wanted to see if each worked on its own and then see if the haiku married into the poem. I'm pretty pleased with it. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteAnthony you comments validate what I wanted to achieve, thank you.
ReplyDeleteBrian I have to admit that is my favorite haiku of the piece in addition to the last one. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteLady Ngo - I'm pleased you felt that haunting quality. I was going for that and wondered if it succeeded. Thanks.
ReplyDeleteSuzicate - Yes as I said above and have said many times - startings are my problems. Almost always have endings in mind. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteTalon - Thank you. This is Sam the cat, sitting on my feet as I write you. He is 18.5 yrs old and has quite a personality. He seems to get more handsome with age. He would purr for you if he could :)
ReplyDeletecianphelan - thank you for the rhythmic allusion. I did try getting that feeling in there while still trying to stick to the 5-7-5 formula. It was tricky.
ReplyDeleteA special month indeed!!
ReplyDelete"Ends meet beginnings
the future lies in mirrors
the past, jacket close" -- this really are THE most apt way for November!!
It is just another month, and yet, we look on it as a end to a not-so-great-start and as a beginning to a possibly-better future... I wonder why we do that every single year! And more importantly, WHY!
Well, if knew the answers, we wouldn't have! :)
But November still continues to be that melting pot of memories, that pool of renewed hope...
And your lovely poem does full justice to it!!!
kavisionz - thank you. Yes the close of the year and the warmth of reunion for those of us in the US as we turn our thoughts toward home, family and gratitude. This year I'm especially thankful for the new friends I've found in the world of poetry, for opening the door to something I love so much that had been ignored for a while.
ReplyDeleteThank you for the beautiful poem. I loved how you captured the beauty of fall, and the cycle that we go through year after year. I loved the line "dancing pirouettes". Very vivid and easily related to. Thank you for a wonderful one shot.
ReplyDeleteThank you Cor and everyone for coming by to read. I really do appreciate it. It is a year-end celebration poem with the realization that age happens and yet is somehow meaningless.
ReplyDeleteLove November...it is the most beautiful months where I live ..loves its gold in stone and color...you define it well in this lovely piece....nice one shot..bkm
ReplyDeleteThanks bkm - the colors have special meaning between me and the person I wrote it for.
ReplyDeletelife unravels....love your poem;)
ReplyDeleteGay...
ReplyDeleteThis had a nostalgic ring to that I loved.
Great One Shot....G
The phrasing you used to get across your theme struck a real chord with me. As someone who spends a lot of time thinking about the staggering pace of change in life, this piece really hit home. Thanks for posting such a beautiful poem. Always a pleasure to read your poetry.
ReplyDeletecrb.
Thank you CRB. I probably needed your comment about now more than you know. One of those "overloaded" kind of days, the kind that make you unsure of yourself. I gave it as a birthday gift, and thankfully it was well received. I like your poetry very much too. Gay
ReplyDeleteDavid Waters - it does unravel like a ribbon from a spool, I think sometimes, or like a sweater caught on a pin. I've used this allusion before because I see it that way. Thank you for loving it.
ReplyDeleteG-Man - The nostalgia may have been subconscious or subliminal or something. The person I wrote this for, I've known since high school. We've been friends through life's celebrations and adversities for many years.
ReplyDeleteThis is so beautiful, Gay. I love that you wrote it for a friend's birthday. My oldest friend is from high school too, and these lines said it all for me:
ReplyDelete"Debris of spent years
caught in the cracks and corners
now treasured relics"
Thank you for your visit to my entry, and your comments on it. I'm so glad it struck such personal chords for you. It sounds as if your love was very special.
Interesting poem. Have to read again and again to go deeper. Thanks for sharing it! BTW beautiful cat.
ReplyDeleteLovely tribute to an old fashioned November. Love your writing Gay, you brought a sparkle to my morning.
ReplyDeleteGreat autumn writing, with an equally great wrap-up stanza that brings it back to its emotional core.
ReplyDeleteLove your imagery especially: "while time dances pirouettes" and "memories like darting birds."
ReplyDeleteAlso love the pic in your blog header! I had a cat once who looked like this, half Persian--Pretzels, he was a treasure. Thanks for sharing your beautiful poem and bringing back memories.
It was a gift to my eyes. Wonderfully emotional writing that captured the season quite well. Nicely done!
ReplyDeleteWhat an uplifting group of comments to wake to.
ReplyDeletePattiKen I did have a great love and friendship with my husband and I loved the piece on your blog for this week. Thank you for this.
Poemblaze - I appreciate that from you. I think there is a layering of time and meaning within the lines at least for me anyway. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteThank you repressedsoul as you did to mine!
ReplyDeleteMelissa Campbell Thank you regarding your mentio of my imagery. I think since junior high when I fell in love with PATTERNS by Amy Lowell, I aimed to be an "imagist" poet. While I have been influenced by many writers, looking back at my pieces, I think that I would hesitantly apply that label to my work. Thanks again!
ReplyDeleteG.K. Asante - I gladly give it to you as gift. Thank you for reading and commenting. Gay
ReplyDeleteSteve, thanks for coming to read and for your comment. Yes, the piece has a lot of emotion stemming from the friendship at its source.
ReplyDeleteFunny how debris can become treasure. Nice One Shot, Gay!
ReplyDeleteWONDERFUL WRITE Bea..soothing beauty..can't get enough of reading it really! WOW..striking love..:)
ReplyDelete"memories like darting birds."
isn't it just capturing?? :))
Eric - how tiny gifts, notes, scribbles and cards can be shoved into drawers and boxes! Thanks for the read and comment...Gay
ReplyDeleteAt D.Rose I always enjoy your take on my work. Thank you for coming to comment. I appreciate it.
ReplyDeleteGay
beautiful gay
ReplyDeletemy favorite stanza was the last one - really strong and ..the future lies in mirrors
the past, jacket close...
Beautiful poem. I love its melody, the words are a song for autumn and November. Enjoyed reading it very much.
ReplyDeleteClaudia, have to give the jacket reference to Pete. I was writing this while reading his poem re Guy Fawkes and I didn't get the reference to jackets - finally thought it was about sausages but we never called the skins jackets. But he wrote back saying the reference was a dual one to the effigy of Guy Fawkes in a jacket and to potato jackets (which of course we do say...but I forgot it) and while I was bumbling around thinking about jackets and writing that line, I thought yes...the past is as close to us as the clothes we have on and it's the season to pull out sweaters and jackets...a little bit of the process there if you were interested :) Thanks Claudia...Gay
ReplyDeleteThanks Myrna, just read your beautiful and touching poem. Thank you for stopping by and reading. It's nice to meet you. Gay
ReplyDeleteI love the rhythm of this piece. It just makes you keep reading and reading...
ReplyDeleteSo far one of the best ones I've read... great one shot!
ReplyDeletetold ya!!!!
ReplyDeletebeautiful! great rhythm and imagery
ReplyDeletethank you
Nick...that's how I'm feeling about everyone I'm reading today. Thank you for those words.
ReplyDeleteDulce - so kind of you, but there are miles to go before we sleep- and works of such great artistry and power on oneshot today! Oh my!
ReplyDeletePete - thank you so much for stopping back by.
ReplyDeleteThank you Hope for reading and commenting. I appreciate it so much!
ReplyDeleteSweet write...the part where you said the future is in the mirror got me wondering...I like the systematic nature you went about the message. Nicely done.
ReplyDeleteCheers!
You're the first to comment on that. When you get to a certain age, you start looking like your parents or grandparents or bits of others and you graft those lives and stories into the possibilities of what lies ahead for you. I see my eyes turning to my grandmother's. I see my mother's expressions when I'm tired and I wonder..will I be in a little like she was
ReplyDeletewhile time dances pirouettes...
ReplyDeleteabsolutely gorgeous friend. you always stun me.
and you always, always encourage me on my posts. thank you.
Oh Emily I always love your work. I always feel you've let me in on your inner self. What a facility for "peeling the onion" you have! I am gratified that you liked this piece. It means a lot to me. Bless you, Gay
ReplyDeleteWow absolutely beautiful I love this, seeing and feeling...everything, very visual in a sense of days gone by too, love the image!! :) April
ReplyDeleteReally great. Loved the image, too, I'm especially drawn to the sky.
ReplyDeleteEnds meets beginning
ReplyDeletefuture lies in mirrors
past,jacket close.
I love these lines.Like they say,when a door closes,a window opens.
Fabulous visual.Love the poem before I read it.Always a joy to see a beautiful pic accompanying a beautiful poem.
I enjoyed it so much.. your words were so beautiful like...'Your life unravels
ReplyDeletewhile time dances pirouettes
overlapping itself " what an image your have created with your words.. thanks for sharing..
ॐ नमः शिवाय
Om Namah Shivaya
Twitter: @VerseEveryDay
Blog: http://shadowdancingwithmind.blogspot.com
Incredible write. Loved it!
ReplyDeleteApril and Faith - the image I scanned from a greeting card set I've had for a while. The artist wasn't listed on the card so I believe it must be in the common domain. I loved all four cards. Thought this looked November like to me as the men are in shirt sleeves, but the leaves are gone. Reminds me of towns when I was very young.
ReplyDeleteGlad you like it. Thanks, Gay
June, Shashi and River - Thanks so much for coming to read. So thrilled you liked the poem. I think working in this form forces me to more concise thinking. Pleased this was successful.
ReplyDeleteGay
June, I love your take on that verse too. Thank you for visiting, come again any time. Gay
ReplyDeleteLovely set of eight haiku stanzas. Nicely done, my friend
ReplyDeleteRegards
Luke @ WordSalad
"light's bright rays, brilliant year-end days"
ReplyDeleteSix words captured November light and the feeling one gets at this time of the year to appreciate the here and now, because so soon it will be gone. That burst of pre-death glow so often seen in the dying, whether animals, humans or season of earth - it's always poignant, exciting and beautiful. Just like your poem. Nice One shot!
Thanks Luke - This is my third or fourth piece to utilize haiku as stanzas. I like the way it focuses me.
ReplyDeleteI like that you mentioned the first set. I never know exactly where to start something. My ideas at the start are so scattered.
ReplyDeleteYour explication is exactly the tone and meaning I wanted for this work. My friend and I are at the place in our lives where we are in between. The past helped define us and the future a blaze of glory before it all ends :)
My last comment should have been addressed to brokenpenwriter..sorry.
ReplyDeleteDear Gay,
ReplyDeleteLovely tribute to November! Surely one of your best. And I know what you mean when you say you love it when it comes in one breath. I too have poetry that just writes itself...
I know it's Thursday, but have a great weekend!