cricket click-it ripple drip drip cave hum
leaves rustle - reeds moan - limbs rattle - flies thrumb
wind and water insect chirps and swan cries
compose lines for dinosaur lullabyes
harmonies cacophanies wreath cave man
in sea melodies heard on shells and sand
stone on stone-a drum band surprises him
smashing sounds makes rhythm a sharp edged din
tied to a sturdy stick he plays an axe
later tying "strings" he tunes and attacks
tiny reeds sharpened to points pierce others
his breath blows through-birds become his brothers
voicing song with drums, strings, flutes at the start
man making music blew each age apart
© Gay Reiser Cannon * 2012 * All Rights Reserved
Linked today @dVersePoets Pub for Open Link Night
Posted late for #FormForAll A Clarian Sonnet -Sam Peralta
Late also for #Poetics - Stu McPherson
Wow, I love this and what an incredible recording! The transformation and sense of motion through the ages is palpable and blew me apart. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteThank you Anna. Coming from a musician it's all the more appreciated.
Deletenice...love your recording gay...nicepacing...and some great sounds in your words and textures...stone on stone a drum band surprises him...nice...man making music blew each age apart...ha...love that line much....nice gay
ReplyDeleteThanks Brian. Loved yours a lot this week too!
DeleteLove your use of language in this piece! Also-- love that last line. Enjoyed this much.
ReplyDeleteVery much appreciated!
DeleteLove how percusive the language is and loved the last line!
ReplyDeleteI'm glad that came through. I had that sense of finding "tools" and hearing music. Percussion, water, bird songs, and wind - they must have been the first ideas of music.
DeleteLove the reading and love what you did here with word-sound.
ReplyDeleteThanks. I worried that it might run together. Apparently it wasn't meant to be punctuated but I did use dashes to slow down the read.
DeleteI enjoyed listening to your reading before reading the poem silently; you give the words a rhythm, a feeling, a building up of sounds leading to the final explosive line that adds much to the experience of the poem. You present an interesting interplay, too, between the violence of the instruments (or their making), as defined in your choice of words, and the music that issues. Nice rhymes, as well.
ReplyDeleteI appreciate your careful consideration and explication with every write. Your close readings of my work are invaluable to me.
DeleteThe rhythm of this is wonderful. I read it as a fast chant, then heard your version. Love the idea of dinosaur lullabies.!
ReplyDeleteYes, thank you. I thought it might read rather quickly. It spurred me to record it. Thanks for the comment, Matt.
DeleteThis is genius....so musical!...AND to put this in the clarian sonnet form....phew....more than a match for my pen for sure!.... This was percussion, strings, trumpets, everything! So so cool....
ReplyDeleteHigh praise Stu. Your article was so good but I was going through a minor crisis and had many trips into town to take in the last week. I had to triple up with one poem to do the work of three. Wish I were more prolific but when I hurry up, my output is very poor I'm afraid. I'm glad this was met with approval. Thank you.
Deletewow what a feast,this is how time can be a soothed savage beast or at least the pattered rhythm of what really matters when we sing or string the lights of our soul being strummed...love this...thanks for sharing...
ReplyDeleteHow kind of you to say. I wanted to think back to the natural roots of music and then bring instrument making forward in time. Perhaps explore types of music up to the point of rock & roll initially; but as I examined the subject I realized every era had "their music" which was as radical and revolutionary as "rock and roll" turned out to be in the 20th century. Music changes and defines a generation, builds its bonds with one another, connects them on life's journey.
Deletevery very cool hearing your voice for the 1st time, Gay! loved the way you read the piece... gave the words sooo much life
ReplyDeleteIs it really Anthony. I have many voices - sure you didn't hear that twangy Texas one? Very nice of you to say anyway!
DeleteThis made me smile on an otherwise dreary, rainy day..lovely Gay!
ReplyDeleteThanks so much Gwen. I did spend more time on the last couplet than I did on the rest of the poem combined. I knew what I wanted but it was hard to find it. Thanks again.
DeleteThis is a sheer poetic delight! It just had to be this way... Dinasour lullabyes...lol! Man making music blew each age apart. This has got to be one of my favorites. You certainly do the language justice and then some! Wonderful!!
ReplyDeleteJackie, I love your comments. They always build my self-confidence. Thank you!
Deletehey Gay - double wow! on the recording - it totally blows up the whole piece
ReplyDeleteinto the strat of my foghead! - light house revolving dark art -
tied to a sturdy stick he plays an axe
later tying "strings" he tunes and attacks
love thrumb too -
outstanding Gay - a memorable piece :D
You're awesome Arron! I love hearing from you on my poetry. Your work never ceases to inspire me! Thank you.
DeleteOh Gay I love your narrative your voice I could listen to for hours - it's hypnotic - and that word 'thrumb' keep saying it - as ever Brilliance!!!!!! Love Lib
ReplyDeleteLib - you are so good for my ego. The secret was to record it before my Texas accent kicked in - usually about 2 p.m. - and all my whang kicks in!
DeleteThis really doesn't read like a sonnet, which is all to its credit, in my opinion--it has a wild experimental sort of feel that is the opposite of form, yet it slips effortless inside that envelope. Very inriguing and complex take on the prompts.
ReplyDeleteThanks you for these words Joy. It seems to be taking me longer every week to write a poem. I must have 100 ideas in scraps but it takes so much to get anything out and it's still going down with minimal edits. It once took me 20 or 30 rewrites to be ok enough with a poem. I do think writing more hones the craft, but I'm still incredibly slow. I appreciate all your comments, I want you to know.
DeleteSo much fun! I love the dinosaur lullabies... Playful and very well done!
ReplyDeleteDon't you think waterfalls and windsongs must have lulled those prehistoric animals? It's rather sweet to consider, I think!
DeleteI enjoyed the sounds and lilt of your voice Gay ~
ReplyDeleteI didn't noticed the form until I read your note as it flowed very nicely ~
I like this music ~
Thank you Grace for always being so kind and so supportive!
DeleteLove the reading...beautiful!
ReplyDeleteThanks Ayala, I'll be by tomorrow to read yours.
DeleteSomething about your voice and this poem re-minds of being at a really cool poetry club. when I was done I didn't if I wanted to snap or clap sophisticated. well done
ReplyDeletehttp://leah-jamielynn.typepad.com
Doesn't that sound like fun!! Thank you for that. I think I can thank Stu for coming up with the music prompt on Poetics because I came up with such a "massive" idea for the clarion sonnet that Sam wrote about that it has required about 30 hours of research so far. So far I have about 40 pages of notes and clearly I can't write it in 140 syllables. I appreciated the vote of approval!
DeleteYou read this perfectly and savored each word as though it were a note.
ReplyDeleteman making music blew each age apart... Wonderful!
Thank you so much. Music is a passion of mine but isn't that true for everyone? My grandkids think I'm so cool though because I made a pledge in the 50s I wouldn't get stuck in a genre. (But I do have some faves, of course) So I know most of the new popular music.
DeleteSo clever! I am thinking of Leakey! And 2001! And Jane Goodall! And poetry! Thanks much. k.
ReplyDeleteHow cool. I walked around all last night saying - I want a last couplet that does that thing, you know that thing that happened with the bone in 2001. I must have succeeded. Thank you thank you thank you for that affirmation!
DeleteArchaeologists believe that music-making is very, very old in the human psyche, with bone-flutes found in Paleolithic caves 30 thousand years old. We surely sang before we talked, which is why poetry has such ancient primacy (though don't tell publishers that). Great weave of the aural inscape: the world sang to us, and we sang back. - Brendan
ReplyDeleteListened to this on the train as it passed through the blasted heaths of the New Forest - a local national park. Wonderful sonics and imagery. Your reading made it ooze with sensulness!
ReplyDeleteDamn! can't hear it. Probably my connection. Great on the page, though.
ReplyDeleteThis was so wonderful, Gay! It was a delight hearing your voice, and it reinforces for me....that poetry should be HEARD...not just read.
ReplyDeleteThere is something transcending in hearing a poet speak their poetry! The cadence, the intonation, the individual color of the poet's voice...all makes it a heightened experience for me.
Brava!! This was a delight! Beyond the sound, the poem is startling broad. I thought of a little boy, and a caveman. LOL!
I just got lost in your voice...and it was Good. Like Faulkner said: imagination, experience and observation makes a poet. You have all three in large capacity.
Lady Nyo
aaaahhhh...that's music...man making music blew each age apart... love this gay..and great reading as well
ReplyDeleteFor some reason, I wasn't able to play the music, but I can tell you that your words were musical on their own! Lovely and fun rhythm, snap, and pop. I'll try back another time...would love to hear!
ReplyDelete-Eva VP
Love this - at first the music of your voice wouldn't play for me, but then obliged!
ReplyDeleteAnna :o]