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Thursday, November 14, 2013

American Sentences

The park across the street - torn up with new project for drainage - since March our neighborhood invaded by loud yet graceful machines reshaping the areas behind our houses and a fourth of the park.


Kobelco excavator ballet yields school boy Kings of the Mountain!

Dogs heel with owners to end of sidewalk then break command to climb mounds.

Weekends, dads seek thrills; risk pushing strollers up steep mounds, through construction.

Cats pull back, birds relocate, now the machines have claimed the neighborhood.


He cruised the Castro with his wolf - the howls from the bars not for the wolf.

Quaking aspen wept orange when striped moon burst over snowy mountain.

                             Found:  In headlines

Cross-bow arrow pierces young deer's face; cougar attacks & kills woman.
Meet Wilco, the service dog - a wounded warrior, walking tall.






41 comments:

  1. My favorite is the second one! I can just picture those well-behaved dogs then making a run for it!! I enjoyed this challenge, Gay. It was something different.

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  2. Yes.. I do understand ... these are images sharply cut.. especially the 3rd one captured me.

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  3. I like the last one best Gay! Great image. It made me think of a painting.

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  4. Gay your sentences are very well done. I apologize for my contribution to your prompt. I only read Susan Daniels poem this morning saw Ginsberg sentences and went the Whitman route, hardly 17 syllabales, but it is what it is and I'm not good at that form anyway. >KB

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    1. I'm not very good at this either I'm afraid - hard for me to find the aha! (smiles)

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  5. Moon bursting over the snowy mountain is a breathtaking image. Great write.

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  6. These are brilliant and unsettling at the same time, Gay. Love what you did!

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  7. These are very much American sentences. Well done. ~

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  8. These are terrific, Gay; loved the ones from the media today. Really dug #4, kind of dystopian & Beat.

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  9. Oh these are great. I smiled at the boy kings of the mountains and the dads and strollers - not too much difference from boy to man, hee hee. Love the service dog headline, saddened by the crossbow one. The striped moon bursting over the mountain is a fabulous image.

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  10. So very, very rich! What a feast for the mind! :)

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  11. Something about a big pile of dirt just makes you want to climb up high.
    Thanks for sharing this with us Gay! I think it's pretty cool, although a bit of a challenge for long-winded poets like me. I am definitely going to do this again!

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  12. i agree with björn...sharply cut images indeed... and that last one...Quaking aspen wept orange.... oh i like much...

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  13. Blogger swallowed my comment! I wonder if I can rewrite-- I like how the first 4 work together with sharp images to show the machine ballet and its consequences for animals, land, people, and birds. The headlines are totally startling. I haven't tried it myself yet, but I'm looking forward to working this prompt.

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    1. I HATE it when it does that. Thanks for the comments. Much appreciated - this isn't easy for me, but I think it will serve me well. Hope you find it true also.

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  14. thank goodness for those serving dogs...they are heros for sure....really great job on yours you nailed some cool descriptions and movement....we used to go play at a construction site...love me the dirt mounds....

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  15. MY favorite: those weeping aspen, moon, and snowy mountain.
    See you next year, Colorado.....

    Gay, this challenge was--IS--the most fun I've had in dVerse since the New Years Eve Party,
    when the sun finally climbed through wall of darkness to again display those poetic rosy fingers. THANKS!

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  16. Love the scenes you paint with so few syllables! The dads with the strollers made me smile - K

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  17. Your sentence that most resonates: Cats pull back, birds relocate, now the machines have claimed the neighborhood.
    How true and sad this is.
    Anna :o]

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  18. Beautiful Gay specially this: when striped moon burst over snowy mountain.

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  19. So good, love these. I have this window open and keep coming back to read them.

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  20. I love these, all the images are wonderful. :-)

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  21. All of these are great but, the last one was my favorite..

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  22. Liking all of these for their content, especially the 4th and last...thank you, Gay.

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  23. Especially like the dog & cat one ... pets seem to be extra sensitive to noise. Well done, and thank you for the informative article on American sentences :)

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  24. good ones, nice collection, and the found headline poems, too. Fun

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  25. 'Quaking aspen wept orange when striped moon burst over snowy mountain.' ~ love this image and sentence-haiku ~ thanks for challenge!

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  26. Wow!! loved wach one of them esp the first and fourth! :0 thank you for a lovely prompt!!

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  27. The last one is my favorite. I like how the "w" sound is used.

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  28. I enjoy your subjects. Boys, dads, dogs, and thrill seeking : ) My favorite of them, however, is the quaking aspen sentence... incredibly and explosively visual. this is great fun, Gay. THanks.

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    1. Oh didn't have too much in mind after I wrote the article. For several months the houses and its occupants in the neighborhood have been part of having the drainage ditch excavated, redesigned, deepened, broadened, walls installed, bottom set with paving stones an lots of vibrations and noise, new sidewalks in the park and this dig which is going to be a retaining pool where children can play soccer when it's dry. It's been absorbing for us all. They are almost finished behind my house except for one stretch of fence that they should replace.

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  29. Oh, what wonderful American sentences! I was intrigued to note that they are 'found poems' from headlines. Must give that a try some time soon - I like both American Sentences and found poems; what fun to marry them.

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    1. Oh, I see now that only a couple were 'found' - but all are arresting, full of fresh perspective.

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  30. That is quite a combination of american sentences and inspirations. Pulling four out of excavation across the street is impressive. #5 had that edge and twist that popped (after reading it several times for context). What a great idea pulling sentence poems from the headlines; I must try that soon.

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  31. I suppose I should post a p.s. regarding the deer - they were able to find it again after the first sighting, tranquilize it and remove the arrow. They gave it a couple of stitches and an antibiotic and it was good as new after a while. Never read the article on the cougar but they were sequential items on CNN and I thought it was interesting to think that a cougar might seek revenge for a deer - unlikely as that might be.

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  32. I loved the aspen wept orange and the striped moon...such a beautiful image. Also the excavating, birds relocating as the machines roll in...that's always sad. So many interesting ways to inspire. A fabulous prompt thank you!

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  33. loved this - Quaking aspen wept orange when striped moon burst over snowy mountain.
    :) loved them all

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  34. Love this, especially 'Quaking aspen wept orange when striped moon burst over snowy mountain'.

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  35. merry christmas gay!
    i hope you have a wonderful day full of love
    & light!

    and thank you...for being you.
    smiles.

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  36. Of course, what a magnificent website and illuminating posts, I definitely will bookmark your blog.Have an awsome day!
    chat us online games

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  37. Hi Gay, this is a terrifically creative and vivid piece - really enjoyed it and it also gave me real inspiration to take away too - which doesn't happen that often - Great Stuff... With Best Wishes to you Scott www.scotthastie.com

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